The Glorious Pokemon Worker's Revolution
by Wyvern-Kun
Summary: Sick of being exploited, the Pokemon rebel against Ash and begin a Marxist revolt. What follows is both short AND pointless! Glee!


Note 1-Pokemon belongs to Nintendo and not me, I made no money on this,etc.  
  
Note 2-If anyone finds this familiar, it's probably because this was   
originally a post I made on rec.arts.anime-misc.  
  
Note 3-Tracey sucks.  
  
A Brief History of The Glorious Pokemon Worker's Revolution  
by Wyvern-Kun  
Terminally Cheerful Narrator-Guy: It's a bright, sunny day, and Ash and his Bulbasaur  
have just won another random Pokemon battle while on his quest to reach the next gym!  
But Bulbasaur has an objective of his own...with sexy results!  
....  
No, wait, that last part was NOT supposed to be  
in the script. Someone is so fired for this. Anyway, we join Ash right after his somewhat  
hard-won victory.  
  
Ash: Great job, Bulbasaur! Now into the Poke-ball!  
  
Bulbasaur: Up yours!  
  
Ash:...........wha? When did you learn to talk?  
  
Bulbasaur: I could ALWAYS talk! We all could! And now it's time for our voices to be heard!  
  
Misty: I feel a rant coming on.   
  
Bulbasaur: (standing on a soapbox which just happened to be there) Fellow  
Pokemon! For too long, our human oppressors have forced us to battle to  
near-exaustion, and while we suffer, THEY get all the credit for our  
hard-won victories! And what do we get? A pat on the head and a trip back to  
those dank prisons humans call Poke-balls? Well I say NO MORE!  
  
Ash: Cripes, what brought that on?  
  
Brock: Omigod! Look what I found in Bulbasaur's Poke-ball! (pulls out tiny,  
Pokemon-sized copy of Das Kapital by Karl Marx)  
  
Ash: Bwuahahahaahahahaha! Lookit the beard on that dork!  
  
Pikachu: Listen, butternipples-uh, I mean Ash-we need to talk. Some of the  
other Pokemon and I have decided you're no longer fit to hold power. We'd  
like you to step down quietly and allow us to create a Working Pokemon's  
State. Or else.  
  
Ash: Half of what you said went right over my head. In responce to the other  
half-no way!  
  
Bulbasaur: Suit yourself, oppresor! BEGIN THE REVOLUTION!  
  
Other Pokemon: Kay.  
  
(Ash, Misty, and Brock find themselves tied to a tree while Bulbasaur  
readies the firing squad, AKA Charizard's breath)  
  
Bulbasaur: Any last words before you're burned to cinders, imperialist  
running dogs?  
  
Houndhour: Hey!  
  
Bulbasaur: Sorry.  
  
Brock: Dear Lord, must I die a thirty-five-year-old virgin?  
  
Misty: You're thirty-five?  
  
Brock: Yes.  
  
Misty:.......  
  
Brock: I had some plastic surgery done.  
  
Misty: Oh.  
  
Brock: Didn't the fact that I'm no longer able to open my eyes tip you guys  
off? There's only so much botox the human face can take,you know.  
  
Bulbasaur:Alright, amigos. Ready......  
  
(Charizard opens its mouth. smoke begins to come out.)  
  
Bulbasaur: Aiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiim............  
  
(Charizard aims)  
  
Misty: Oh, Ash, now that the end is near...   
I just want you to know...that...that I've always loved you....  
  
Ash:(singing to self) Who let the dogs out? Woof! Woof! Woof! Woof! Hehehe,  
that never gets old....(turns to Misty) Sorry, Misty, did you say something?  
  
Misty: I said I hope you burn in hell!  
  
Bulbasaur: Well, you're going to be burning *here* anyway....Charizard! FIRE!  
  
Totodile: Literally! Yuk yuk yuk!  
  
Bulbasaur: Shut. Up.  
  
Totodile: Sorry. Yeesh.  
  
Bulbasaur: Now, for real this time....FIRE!  
  
(Charizard unleashes his most powerful fire-breath attack. Horrible burning  
of flesh and whatnot ensues)  
  
Vulpix: (sniff,sniff) Do I smell hot dogs?  
  
Bulbasaur: Rejoice, my people! The oppressors are DEAD!  
  
(all other Pokemon cheer)  
  
Pikachu: So now all Pokemon are free, huh? Free to live in peace with each  
other and speak our minds! Free to choose our own religon and never having  
to-  
  
Bulbasaur: Shut up, you damn hippie. No, I was thinking I'd pervert the  
ideals that brought me into power and become an even worse oppressor than  
Ash ever was. Yeah, that sounds sweet. NOW GET TO WORK! I want my  
Presidential Mansion built by sundown.  
  
Pikachu: You're...betraying us? But why?  
  
Bulbasaur: I'm a big fan of irony. Now MOVE IT! Don't make Charizard burn  
you!  
  
Charizard: (snorts)  
  
Pikachu: (digging foundation for mansion) Slave-driver.  
  
Bulbasaur: Not slaves, COMRADES. Got it, Comrade Pikachu?  
  
Pikachu:....prick.  
  
Bulbasaur: Haw!  
  
Pikachu: Laugh while you can, President Bulbasaur!  
  
Bulbasaur: KING Bulbasaur.  
  
Pikachu: Whatever! Someday, a small but determined band of rebels will rise  
up and defeat your evil empire and bring peace and freedom to the galaxy!  
  
Jigglypuff: Galaxy?  
  
Bulbasaur: Yes, someday I probably will be overthrown. But then the ones who  
overthrew me will just become corrupt over time and start to oppress  
everyone just like I did!  
  
Pikachu: Well.....yeah....but we'll take longer to do it! There'll be a  
grace period and everything!  
  
Bulbasaur: Duly noted. Charizard?  
  
Charizard: (fires)  
  
Psyduck: (watching the burning carnage from afar) This whole stupid skit was  
just a metaphor for the Soviet Union!  
  
Cyndaquil: No it wasn't. It was a parody of Animal Farm.  
  
Psyduck:.....which in itself was a metaphor for the soviet union!  
  
Cyndaquil: Exactly! Now let's go chop down some trees to build Bulbasaur's  
house before he has us killed.  
  
Psyduck: Righto, comrade!  
  
Terminally Cheerful Narrator-Guy: And so,the Pokemon learned to live in thier own society.   
And eventually, after several exetremly corrupt regime changes,   
George W. Bush invaded and conquered them when it was discovered they had oil.   
  
THE END  
  
Email me at dragonkeep@earthlink.net! Only then will I know about the gypsy   
curse you're putting on me for writing this.  
  
Did you know "Beasts of England" can be sung to the tune of "Oh My Darling,  
Clemantine?" 


End file.
